what it doooo?! soo chea, Thursday, I got my nose peirced, and it hurt like a mutha, dude that did it was mad scary. Shakin` like no other, I was like omg, my dude, calm down, dont kill me. but it looks mad cute. I love it. I keep fuqin qith it, and I think im not suppost to, but fuq it. It`s mad hot outside, I dont like spring/summre at alll. But I`ll prolly be chillin in the house or at the water park alot. Workin` on my tan. nahh lol. but i been chillin, lifes been pretty good. I`m goin` baq to school on monday. hm, yay! [sarcasim] ii hate that fuqin school mayne. I`m not going to that shit next year, ion givva fuq what nobody says. soo chea. iiono what else to say, but im lovin life right now. its all good, lets hope it stays that way. because im so tired of being pissed off all the damn time, soooo im out, peazyyyyyyyyyyyyyy my beeziesssssssssssssss.

whats really good yall? woo so, where do I begin? Life is kinda good right now. I think I like someone, although, last night I was all "I love you sooo much nigga." He talking about, "you don`t lovee me." It was silly. Its just a little crush, so its whatever. But if he want to get with me, like if that nigga changes his mind, then I`m down. Cause I`m like sprung over him. So thats what that is. Today was okay, I basicalled chilled. I`m hoping to go to chicago with ricki [my old man lol]. That niqqa a trip. Told me we over because I didn`t call him. I`m like, "my dude, how we over and we never had anything going on to begin with?" He dumb, but thats my dude lol. I got high saturday, had the munchies like no othaa, and sunday, my sisters and I all got into this retarded ass arguement, but my older sister in jail now, so thats that. It doesn`t phaze me, that bitch should known better then to be tryna act like she gets buck. Its whateva though. I`m on chill mode right, im bout to go call my boo, so I`m gone, peace bitchessssssss.

i knoww, its blury, its suppost to be like that.

If tha game Shakes me or Breaks me I hope it makes me a betta (MAN)

in the past 2 weeks ive been through so much. Now I`m not tryna lay my shit out there for everyone, but life is so hard for me right now. In the end, lookin inward, my situation seems so over exaggerated. I went into a hospital for causing self ingury to myself. Then I went into outpacient, and everyday, its in your face questions about why you did this, why you did that, how you can prevent yourself from doing it again, and I`m so tired. Today in a family session I broke down. And I don`t know how to handle this shit. My heart hurts so bad right now, and thats no joke. I feel like some bitch stuck a knife through me, and now its hard to breathe. I`m not looking for pitty, Just someone to listen to my side of the story. I know life isant fair, but how can you change your situation when theres no way out. I refuse to settle for less then the best so I`m unhappy now. I wanted to change schools, not thinking my situation would change, and that there wouldnt be racism anyother place, or girls sayin dumb shit to get kicks, just a fresh start. Something new, maybe a place with a little less minoritys. This shit is now so fuqed up, I don`t know why I wanted this in the first place. Bitches act like its so difficult, and its not. Its just NOT. So I`m like fuq it. I`ll go to school, your school, but I`m not playin by your rules, you can`t tell me a damn thing, cause I`m finna fight untill I`m dead. I`m done with these females. Why can`t I trust anyone? Why does everyone have to play me like I`m dumb, Like I don`t hear aroun the way that you got my name in ya mouth. And you always tryna tell eveyone else what I`m not, and what I do, but half that shit is inncorrect, and you wont ever say it to my face. So I`m gonna play ya games. I`ma do you bitches dirty. Like you did me. If I could have handled this shit when it first popped off, I wouldnt be in the situation I`m in now, So im gonna tough it out like a fuqin hood bitch. Because I know at the end of the day, its the end of the day, and I`m still here, stronger then I was the day before. And thats realk talk.